The L post is late(and maybe a little shorter than I had planned) due to my not feeling so well yesterday….apologies.
It’s funny what you notice when your mind is still and you can actually see without being encumbered by self doubt and fear.
Sitting with Him in the bath last night, my cheek resting against His, I reached round behind Him and started cupping water in my hands, drawing it up, and letting it fall over His skin. I watched as the water traced a path up over His shoulder and down His arm, my fingers following suit, my mind completely at peace, happily lost in the intimacy of the moment. Over and over I repeated this simple act, trying to get as much water as I could in my small hands.
I paused, briefly, just enjoying being close to Him, when He started to do the same to me, cupping His hand behind me, drawing water up my back, stroking His hand back down my body once all the water had been released in order to retrieve some more.
It was whilst I was being treated to the comforting caress of the water that I realised, we do this a lot, mirroring each others actions when intimacy, not D/s, is to the fore, when it’s just us, stripped of titles Sir and pet, open to each other without need for definition, tactility the syntax of our relationship.
I think of the way He cups my face protectively in His hand, the way He draws me to Him and holds me close, and I see that I do the same, especially in quiet moments, when I want to offer Him the same safe haven He creates for me.
There’s a deep sincerity in the way in which we communicate, two people for whom words can be a struggle, who share many personality traits which should by rights hinder us, and our progress. I used to get hung up on that fact, but now I’m learning to let it go, not concentrate so much on lack of words, but see that we have developed this language between us whereby feeling is conveyed through touch, that this is what we both need in order to allow the words to eventually be spoken.